Being rude or Misophonia

Some Misophonia sufferers tend to see people as rude while eating no matter it’s that truly the case or not. I look at that as a sort of a defensive mechanism of their brains trying to find a valid reason to justify that strong, awful reaction they experience while others are eating and doing all kinds of “normal” activities which we can’t sand.

If someone (here I primarily think of Misophonia people) is angry at the person and being offended by some eating happening right there in front of that someone, why just not to ask themselves what would a “normal” person feel in that same situation? It will help you to recognize and analyze what is truly just your Misophonia.

There is a clear line between people being rude while eating and sniffing and else, and between the actual recognition that some people eat politely and we are bothered even with that.

I’ve never seen my Miso as a reason to call people rude, nor I actually think that all Miso people suffer from that point of view. It’s ridiculous. Rude is rude, with or without Miso influence.

Rudeness can be recognized immediately and by everyone. There’s no need for further explanation I think. Assuming that we all know what is being rude while eating. Here’s an example for a clear and clean Miso experience.

Last nigh I was watching something on my laptop, with earphones of course. My husband was  watching TV. He got up of the couch and brought himself some snacks. He pressed my button.

I tried to focus on the show and some woman speaking there while my husband was snacking some chips. I couldn’t. I couldn’t focus just on the sounds that come from my earphones and woman talking on a show. All I can really hear are sounds of him snacking. I was just thinking and feeling how I want to hit him! To hit him so hard to make him feels the same pain I feel while he eats!

Who is wrong there!? I am! The man is just eating for God’s sake! I’m the one who is rude and awful! I am! The problem is just in me. He wants to snack, so who am I to stop him?

I turned the volume up so I can’t hear him. My ears hurt because of loudness, but did it help? No, I could still hear him!

The whole time while he was snacking I was gathering the last pieces of my inner strength to make my body still and calm. To make my brain not to explode.

He snacked for a half an hour!

That was just a half an hour for him and for the rest of the world. For me, those slowly passing minutes and seconds were moments of an excruciating pain, anger, rage, and anything bad you can think of!

And who cares!? No one. No one understand the stupidity of this Misophonia crap!

Of course, I got myself involved in defensive eating. But it wasn’t helpful. Earphones and volume turned so high didn’t help, didn’t protect me from his sounds and from my pain and rage.

I’m angry at him because he’s eating, because he is doing that “thing” when he knows that I would mind!? Something is deeply wrong with this picture. He, on the other side of the room snacking, watching TV, doing what normal people do. I,  on the other side of the room, snacking to beat his sounds, watching a show with my earphones and and volume so high that it actually hurts, doing what Misophonia people normally do…

I’m objective, at least I’m trying to be when analyzing myself. My self analysis  therapies saved my sanity trough my life.

The main issue with us-me is that we are bothered with things that other people can’t stop. They can’t stop eating and breathing. Can we? No.

Anyway… I survived another attack.

Could you just please let me know if there’s a place where I can buy some tolerance and peace! I’ll pay well. I’ll give much just for a bit peace…

Author Description

I love photography and learning about it. I'll try and fail that's for sure, but sometimes, I hope, I'll do good. As for the Misophonia part of the blog, I'll write honestly about my experiences and feelings, trying to help myself and others who feel the same way as I do and maybe to raise some awareness about this condition. All written here is just and only my opinion.

6 Responses to “Being rude or Misophonia”

  1. Jackie January 25, 2014 - Reply

    Wow! I so do understand you since you are writing and describing my situation. My husband has very good manners, he eats politely and yet, I get so angry by listening him eating. Same when he is close to me and and breaths! The rage I feel is ridiculous but I just cannot help it! Sometimes I walk away but when I’m watching a TV show with him, I start mimicking his breathing, to me it feels like there is an elephant breathing right next to my ear.
    I use to feel guilty about it until one day he yelled at me that if wanted him to stop breathing and eating so he wouldn’t disturb me. Of course I don’t want that so I went on line and ask “why I get so angry when people eat, breath….” And it is when to my relief I found out about Misophonia. I stopped feeling like a bad crazy person by knowing that there’s other people who feel the way I do and even though there is no cure, yet, we can maybe support each other. By the way, my husband doesn’t believe in it and doesn’t even want to read about it :(

    • mmaria January 26, 2014 - Reply

      Now it’s time for me to say that you’re describing my situation :)

      Actually, when I saw someone commented, before I read the comment, I thought that someone probably didn’t get it. So glad there’s someone who understands.
      It means so much when you have someone who understand in real life. I don’t.

      But, the good thing though is that we, Misophonia people, in some way, have each other.

      Thank you for your comment. I’m here for you when ever you feel sad, bad or else!

  2. Christine Chevalier February 23, 2014 - Reply

    Thank you Maria for blogging about your condition. I find it so difficult to talk about the symptoms of misophonia without being categorized as a crazy angry bird….I have discovered the term misophonia only very recently. I am thrilled about this yahoo group and the other support networks I found on the www recently.
    I look forward to read your next post.
    Thank you again.

    • mmaria February 23, 2014 - Reply

      Thank you Christine for contacting me!

      The support is really great and it’s the only way we can help each other until they find some cure for us.
      I’m attending a conference so I don’t have much time, but my next post will be about lecturers and almost 200 people eating in one time :)

      Got to run! See you!

  3. June Sperber June 25, 2015 - Reply

    All of what has been written is relevent,more or less, to misaphonia sufferers.The anger, the agony, the lack of understanding and for some like me the anticipation of when things might be likely to happen so anticipation……These sites are very helpful indeed and so helpful with all the information they provide…..I also have hyperacusis which troubles me even more tha misaphonia.

    • mmaria June 25, 2015 - Reply

      Thank you for your comment June! :)

      Somehow, I stopped blogging about Miso even though I really agree with you… every word that’s been written or said by anyone is worthy!

      Sorry to hear about hyperacusis and hope that everything will be ok some day!

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